The Many Faces of Shelby H

Well goodness gracious. How is it August 19th already and where the hell did this summer go? This year has seemed to just slip through my fingers and I will look back on 2012 as the 12 months that felt more like 4. But I'm sure the 3 of you reading this are wondering how the summer has gone. Well, to give you a quick recap...actually, let me just direct you to Kristin's blog instead. She did wonderful posts on my SURPRISE bridal shower and my lovely bachelorette weekend. She was also kind enough to leave out the embarrassing details, such as the fact that I had to stop the girls every 5 minutes to tell them how much I loved them all. Sappy much? There was also Ben and Emily's fabulous Cape Cod wedding which included a lawn ceremony, lobster bake reception, a sweet playlist, and a guest list of 30 people. They did things right! And those are my summer highlights.

Baby Shelby

This weekend I was at home and started looking through one of the many boxes of pictures we have. The fact that boxes of pictures are now a thing of the past makes me incredibly sad, but I digress. As I sorted through these pictures, I was struck by how old I felt. And I know that being 25 and saying, "Gosh I feel old," will make a lot of people cringe, but it's the truth. As I sifted through these pictures and memories, I couldn't help but reflect on how my life is changing.

When sweat suits were all the rage

There was the beginning, when I was freaking adorable and helpless. A baby solely relying on the safety of my parents. Then I learned how to use the microwave, and it was all downhill from there. From that moment on, I was doing things myself and my parents didn't have to wake up at the crack of dawn on Saturday mornings.

My awesome Laura Ashley dress

Then came the elementary school years. Moving into a life separate from home and making friends who would come to shape the girl I would grow into. My years in a Catholic school were both rewarding and frustrating. At this point in my life, I'm still pretty sure I would literally do anything a nun told me to do and feel lucky I was asked.

Have you met my son Shelby?

Right before puberty, I reached a point where all of my hair was cut off and people routinely mistook me for a boy. I think that my feminist ideals probably sprung from this time in my life, but at the time, I just got really upset every time some one gave me something blue. I also lost my baby teeth and had hideous teeth grow in their place, right in time for my self awareness to kick in. Awesome.

World traveler with a sweet hat

At 11, my parents sent me to Australia, without them, and I got my first taste of world traveling. I would never look back. I went on the travel to Europe several times, including England and Ireland, the Caribbean, and Canada (but we can't really count that, can we?). Exposure to other countries and cultures would definitely benefit we later in life, especially when getting into battles of wits with small minded jerk-faces.

A jean jacket with jean capris? Of course!
 London fashion

The high school years hit me at full force. I would again cut off all of my hair and lose a ton of weight and still think I was fat. Ahh, to be 16 again. I joined the Drama club and helped maintained a salt water tank and pretty much stayed under the social radar that is teenage existence. I learned to drive and my fight for independence gained steam. I started thinking about life outside of my hometown and stressing over which college I would get into. I also wore lots of screen print t-shirts.

Went stag to my senior prom and it kicked ass!

Parting from friends I thought I couldn't live without, I started a new chapter in college. College consisted of reading classic literature, studying Chemistry until a small hours of the night, and thinking everything that came out of my mouth was incredibly profound (I'm still not sure it wasn't).

And then it was over and life had to being again once more. I moved into my first apartment, got my first cat, and grew to love coffee. I woke up for work each morning, saw college friends when I could, and watched a  lot of Netflix. And life would have continued on in such a manner had I not been at a bar one night showing people pictures of my cat. But that's another story for another time.

Married with a kid, married, engaged

Three of my future bridesmaids

As I looked through all of these pictures and watched my life unfold before me and a psuedo-chronological manner, I was able to glance at the people I once knew. Some I lost touch with due to distance and time, some I chose to leave behind me, and some have passed away and those were the hardest to look at. Some of these people I knew when they were just 6 years old now are married and/or have children of their own. Some are doctors and some are teachers and they're all living lives they never dreamed of when these pictures were taken.

Dramatic Shelby is dramatic

And then there's the people I used to be. The would-be ballerina, the #1 Buffy fan, the actress, the forensic scientist, the crazy cat lady. And I look at the pictures of past me's with just as much nostalgia, because I'll never be able to meet those girls again. Their crushes and causes and wants that all felt so important at the time and captured in these photos are lost to me now. But every once in a while, I can open those boxes of pictures and pull them all out again and remember all the me's that had to live and die in order for the me of the moment to be born. At 25 I consider myself lucky that there have been so many Shelbys. I am constantly evolving and growing into new people.

Photographic evidence of my first zit

I stand now on the end of my current chapter, waiting for the beginning of a new one. The wedding is 6 weeks away. Single Shelby will be gone forever and Shelby H-T will take her place. She's going to have challenges that I can't even imagine at this point in my life and she's going to make mistakes that will shape future me's. I'm nervous and excited and worried and anxious and a whole list of emotions. But I am looking forward to this next incarnation of myself. I think she has a pretty sturdy foundation and a great web of support. Let's just hope she doesn't trip down the aisle and fall flat on her face, because that will be a picture she will have to destroy.

Reach for the stars!